As a child, I spent time going to parties with my parents. There was no such thing as a babysitter. If a neighbor was having a party, the whole family went. More to the point, if there was a party given by an aunt or uncle, the whole family went.
In the years of my childhood, there wasn’t television, so visiting was done often, and it seemed everyone celebrated birthdays with a party. I often wonder how my parents knew where to go on what date; after all, we never had a telephone.
The fun part of family parties for us kids was we got to see our cousins. Some of the cousins on my mother’s side lived near us, but one of her brothers moved to central Illinois, so we didn’t get to see those cousins very often.
My dad grew up in Milwaukee, so none of my cousins on his side lived near where we lived, so I didn’t get to see them very often either. Plus I always felt a little cheated because most of my cousins were boys, and all the girl cousins near my age lived a full day or more away from our farm.
I was pen pals with two of my cousins, so we kept in touch that way, but it seemed we didn’t see each other nearly often enough.
The most fun times were the weddings or anniversary celebrations within the family. We were sure to see all of our cousins on that side of the family, and us girls could sit and talk and giggle, and try to learn a few dance steps.
I also remember gatherings in homes where games such as Monopoly were played, or various, mostly forgotten, card games. I remember even being fooled by the old 52 pick-up joke. I was red-faced when I discovered that meant throwing the 52 cards in a deck on the floor and making me pick them up.
The years have gone past so fast. Roads have gotten easier to travel, so now what used to take a day is a shorter trip, but still, we get busy and don’t make the time to get together. Unfortunately, that means when we do get together, it usually involves a funeral.
One of my cousins in Illinois died this week. He battled cancer for many years, but finally the time had come. The Shawano area cousins were busy calling each other to try to make travel plans. I chose not to go to this one, as I am still having trouble with my foot swelling, and my back bothers me when I sit too long. I have my prescribed exercises from physical therapy to do, and I felt the ride to and from central Illinois would be too difficult for me at this point.
I admit I will miss the opportunity to say my final farewell, plus miss seeing and hugging all of my other cousins in Illinois. Now that we are getting older, the visits have become less and less.
I recently read something on Facebook about cousins. How they know each other’s secrets, and have a relationship like none other. I am thinking that is a true statement. Even those I didn’t get to see very often as a child, I feel closer to them now.
These memories are tricky things, but worth savoring.
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